bomad.com™

Happy Thanksgiving...from Calcutta

I know. My greetings are a bit late. The Thanksgiving holidays are in fact just past us. Most of you are back at work after a long weekend of belly-stuffing with delicious turkey leftovers. I wish I could be there to join you. But instead, I find myself in Calcutta.

Yes, Calcutta. The very last place on Earth you associate with gluttony and happiness. But this 'City of Joy' has proven quite a surprise, in both its highs and its lows.

Our first three days in India were marked by the folowing "memorable moments:"

1. While walking down the sidewalk, I was temporarily impeded by a naked boy of about 3 who, without notice, squatted and took a dump right there in the middle of my path. The icing on the cake was when he then wiped his ass with his hand, inspected it, and smeared the residuals in the dirt before walking on. All this as if it were as normal as could be. And it is - for Calcutta.

2. As honored guests of Ruby and Manu, upper-crust residents of Calcutta and friends of Carol Fox (thank you, Carol!), we found ourselves one evening standing at the VIP gate of the Calcutta sporting arena, preparing to watch the (in-)famous Russian "Circus on Ice." Yes, Icecapades. A rink full of cold, frozen ice filled with glitter-clad skating cowboys. In Calcutta.

3. The most abject and horrific views of the human condition were on display around Kalighat, or the Temple of Kali. Appropriately, Kali is a goddess of destruction. And in the wake of her temple, human beings are living like animals. They pile up in shacks and sleep in pools of fetid water. The air is suffused with an indescribable stench, exascerbated by the spilt blood and decaying remains of the live goats that are sacrificed at the altar every morning. Oh, I almost forgot--we had to enter this cesspool without any shoes, walking barefoot through puddles of blood, dirty water and human waste. After which we went home and furiously scrubbed the outer layer of skin off our feet.

Well, this is getting long and I should wrap up. But there is so much more to tell. Our journey to the worst slums in all Calcutta, the cheapest lunch of our lives, the best Chai in the world, and a special little girl we met at a home for street kids.

All in, as United Airlines would say, "Three Perfect Days."

Don't worry

We have everything under control. Your passport is in here..uh...somewhere...

This photo was taken at the Indian Embassy in Singapore. And yes, those are piles of passports. And there are piles like this everywhere. No organization, no system. Just piles and piles of critical documents that people depend on.

Getting the Visa requires one week, three trips and a total of 8 hours of waiting, interspersed with number-taking and form-filling. And, of course, plenty of carbon paper receipts.

I think the process of getting a visa is just a trial to see if you can handle India itself.

Mmmm...

Stage 3 Rice and Cod Fish porridge baby food. With Iodine!!

And you guys wonder why we aren't staying in Asia forever. Food trumps technology any day.

Dial-A-Coke

Today I bought a coke from a vending machine. I had no coins, so I used my phone. Yes, I bought a drink with my cellphone. It was so easy. You just send a 5 digit code to a particular phone number thats printed on the machine. Seconds later, the machine flashes and you make your selection. That's it. Frankly it was easier than fumbling for exact change or futzing with a finnecky bill reader. The charge gets deducted from my phone credit and itemized on my bill. Just like a credit card.

The future is here. In Asia, that is. Have to say that as much as I love the USA, we're luddites by comparison to these folks.

The Nose Knows

At the Rubicon wine tasting event the other night, the vintner asked us to describe the 'nose' of his Cabernet Sauvingnon. "What's the 'nose'?" Yu Rhee asked. "It's the smell. You know, where most of the taste of the wine actually comes from," Dale replied.

At this point, Yu Rhee had an epiphany. "Ah! I finally understand why people of European, and not Asian, descent are the world's great wine makers -- they're better equipped for it!" She then proceeded to document the evidence:

A real cock-tale

From the Germans (who else..) a "tasty drink" packaged in a...well...package. "Der Erste Drink aus der Cocktube," the website reads. Which I think means "Don't tell Mom, but I'm the president of a company selling beverages shaped like enourmous phalluses (phallii??)."

This is taking "selling it with sex" to the next level. I bet the drink really sucks...bah-rum-pah!

Christmas Decor--Singapore Style

'cause we all know that nothin says Christmas quite like a life-sized pixie on a giant spotted mushroom...

Advanced Hula Hooping

I was just walkin' down the street, mindin' my own businesss, when this scene caught my eye.

(Click the picture to open a Video Clip in a new window)

Note that this skinny little geezer is swinging a good 40-50lbs of wood beads...and doin it from his neck.

Friends!

Eden recently asked: "Do you guys ever meet anyone on the road? You never talk about other people on your blog!" So Eden, this one's for you.

It's easy to make cool friends in Singapore! For one, the expat population is extremely transient, which means that folks are totally open to meeting new people (what a difference from Paris!). What's more, the people we meet are all remarkably global citizens, which means they're insightful and open-minded, easy to chat with and a lot of fun.

Take this gang of ladies that I was hanging out with the other night at Pierside Kitchen. To my right is Ming. She's an Indonesian/Chinese Singaporean with the elegance of Catherine Deneuve. Ming grew up in Jakarta, went to high school in LA and definitely knows how to have a good time. Upper right is Yu Rhee, a self-described "Korean housewife" with a killer sense of humor who grew up in the US, Bangaladesh and Malaysia, and is now married to a Brit. I didn't get May's (above me) exact bio, but it equals that of the other two. Makes a Hong Kong-born, DC and Hawaii-raised gal like me feel positively provincial!

Don't despair...

Three alternatives to getting bummed out about the results of the US Presidential election:

1) Start campaigning: Hillary Clinton/ Barack Obama '08!

Click here to read about Senator Obama.

2) Join Miranda's "Get Out the Drink" campaign.

3) Make the world a little warmer by smiling at a stranger, celebrating the fact that you contributed to the political process, and telling someone "I love you."